Kirkcaldy

Douglas Strachan war memorial, St. Bryce Kirk

Old Kirk Kirkcaldy

Looking down from the belltower

Up on the parapet (scary!)

Views from the parapet

 

Another class trip. I like to pretend I spend all my time in Scotland climbing church towers...

All Will Be Well

 

 

Whenever I speak to someone at home, they ask, How are you doing? And I answer, Things are good. And things are good, in the same sense as when you say to someone All will be well. It is more a knowledge than a feeling. I am where I am supposed to be, there is growth and experience to come of this, I have friends, I have things to do, and so Things are good.

But I think what some people (ahem... my mom) really mean when they ask that is Are you happy? Ah, but that is different. I am not unhappy. And there are moments when I feel content, or comfortable. And there are moments when I walk out of my front door and think, God, it really is beautiful here isn't it? How lucky I am.

But happy?

I spent one of the happiest weeks of my life in London, about two years ago. But it was not London, the city itself, that brought the happiness. It was what the city represented, which, at that time, was escape.

And I am beginning to think that perhaps, that is part of what St. Andrews was to me when I decided to come here. An escape. But I am learning that an escape is not a home. And a change of outward circumstances does not necessarily bring change to the things that really need it. And perhaps it is not happiness I should be seeking. Not happiness but Joy.

Because it is Joy that acknowledges that All will be well, even if it isn't yet. That knows good things are to come, even if I don't know what they are. Knows that I am being led, even if the road is dark.

This post doesn't have an ending, really, because the thought is still being processed. But I am learning a lot here, you guys. And I am very excited to be coming home in six weeks.